Entries Tagged 'Douche Bags' ↓

Britney had such high hopes for Jamie Lynn. She was hoping she wouldn’t get pregnant at such a young age. She wanted her to be off having fun and appreciating her life. Unfortunately, all the heart-to-hearts did not make a difference with the crazy and failing pop star, and in the end, teenage hormones and a lack of condoms won out.

People Magazine is reporting that Britney told her friends:

“I’m really disappointed in her. I just can’t believe she’s pregnant. She is way too young to be a mum. She should be having fun and stuff, not having a baby. I warned this girl, I really did. I told her over and over just to be a kid and let the adult things like sex and drinking and all that wait.”

You have to admit. Britney really is the perfect one to be saying all this. I can imagine the rest of the conversation going something like this:

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Wow. It sounds like a twisting of words to me. While I don’t recommend anyone in the limelight speak of Adolf Hitler unless they are planning to diss the evil, former dictator/murderer, this honestly looks like a case where Smith put his foot in his mouth 10% of the way and the rest of the world misinterpreted his attempt at honesty the remaining 90%. While Smith did not outright praise the man considered responsible for the death of millions throughout the 1930s and 40s, he did discuss his view that Hitler thought he was doing the right thing.

You can check out what Smith said and see what you think for yourself. He was being interviewed by the UK’s Daily Record at the time of his statement. The interview deals with his newly released film, I Am Legend.
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Now that Lindsay has dumped snowboarder and ex-junkie, Riley Giles, he has tons to say about Lindsay and how their relationship worked.

The most recent blab session was at News of the World, where Riley told the reporters:

“Lindsay’s definitely a nymphomaniac. She’s wild in bed. We’d have sex a couple of times in the day and then go to it through the night. We once did it four times in a row straight. That was crazy. Lindsay was insatiable. She’d demand sex again and again. We’d go at it for hours.”
Riley did not just talk about loose lips and her sexual appetite. It would have been a waste if he had. Everyone has seen the girl change men more than underwear over her coked out years. He also spoke about their deep love for one another.

“Lindsay would tell me she loved me and I’d say that to her, too. And I don’t say that to a lot of girls. She told me she’d only ever had three serious boyfriends - and I’m one of them. We even planned on getting a house and living together out here in Utah. We were together every day for a month and after that I could tell she really loved me a lot by the way she cried and cried when we had to say goodbye at the airport. Her whole attitude changed about three weeks after she got back [to LA]. It went from ‘I want to move to Utah’ to ‘Oh, I love LA so much I don’t ever want to leave.’”

It makes you wonder if he said he loved the chick that he dumped unexpectedly to bed the nympho that later dumped him.

He finished by saying:

“Sadly, I think people would rather see Lindsay with a movie star than some snowboarding guy.”
Nah, we want to see her in church without too much Botox, ugly outfits, or coke stains under her nostrils. Alright, I don’t really want to see her that way, but it’d make for quite an interesting story. Can’t you just see the headlines?

“Lindsay says she is Sorry to God…Offers Favors if she can Still Make it…to Heaven”.

[tags]Lindsay Lohan, Riley Giles, Break Up, Nymphomaniac, Sex, Crazy, Crack Head, Cocaine, Junkie[/tags]

There are absolutely no words that can be said for what you are about to read. Okay, maybe there are four words.

Kanye, you’re a douche.

Spin Magazine Says:

“I’m a pop enigma. I live and breathe every element in life. I rock a bespoke suit and I go to Harold’s for fried chicken. It’s all these things at once, because, as a tastemaker, I find the best of everything. There’s certain things that black people are the best at and certain things that white people are the best at. Whatever we as black people are the best at, I’m a go get that. Like, on Christmas I don’t want any food that tastes white. And when I go to purchase a house, I don’t want my credit to look black.”

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Paris was in Russia recently. She does so many stupid things that it’s almost like I don’t need to go on. However, as much as I hate to talk about her, there is this little special place within me that finds it to be a guilty pleasure. While Paris was in Russia she came across some little people that were dressed as Smurfs for a promotional event.

Paris went on to tell her friend that she loved Smurfs and wanted to add them to her collection. It just goes to show that the South Park episode where Paris wants to adopt Butters and put him in a bear suit wasn’t too far off. It’s a good thing that she didn’t take them home, there would have been a mass suicide of the little people that she caught.

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If this year has taught me anything it’s that Britney is in the wrong line of business. Instead of marketing bad perfume or substandard music she should be marketing her stupidity. If she did that she really could be the next Bill Gates. She could make more than she’s ever dreamed. The reason I am suggesting this move for Brit is because it’s rumored that she’s planning to get married yet again. This time she plans to marry Sam Lufti.

MSNBC Says:

In fact, an insider told the publication Britney already announced her marital ambitions to her lawyers and ex-hubby, Kevin Federline. “[The lawyers] begged her to at least get a prenup, but she didn’t seem to be listening.”

K-Fed’s none too happy, either. “Kevin has seen Sam lose his temper,” said a family spy. “We hear he swears a lot and makes very derogatory statements when he’s alone with Brit. Kevin has forbidden Britney from having Sam around the boys. In fact, Kevin has threatened to get a restraining order. She’ll lose custody if she allows Sam around them; Kevin will make sure of it.”

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It’s pretty sick when you can be a dog killer and still be honored by your teammates and coach. Not only did the Falcons coach mention at Monday’s football game (the Falcons took on the Saints) that he hoped Vick would be back, playing in the NFL, after he is released from prison a few years down the road, but two of his former teammates have paid tribute to their fallen comrade. I don’t get the mentality of those who honor a man who so brutality killed animals, but that’s just me.

DeAngelo Hall, who held up signs and wore MV7 under both eyes as he played, had this to say about his former teammate.

We’re still blaming him for losses we’re getting as a team and he’s not even here to play,” Hall said. “It’s a catch-22 he can’t win.”

WR Roddy Hall made his own t-shirt, which he wore under his jersey during the game. At one point, during the first quarter, he lifted up his jersey to reveal the shirt, which clearly said, “Free Mike Vick” on it. The black shirt with white letters made a splash during another rough game for the Falcons, who lost to New Orleans 34-14. White spoke of the effect Vick’s absence had on the team after the game.

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Way #1 to not get back your kids - Steal something then brag about it on national and/or international television.

It seems Brit Brit’s new Realtor, man, flavor of the moment, isn’t the only one who appears to be as dumb as a stump. Is Britney unaware that she’s on thin ice when it comes to her child custody hearing? I don’t think now would be the ideal time to start stealing things and then bragging about it to the paparazzi. She really has nothing up there, in her head, does she?

Britney has done plenty of stupid crap in the past year or twelve, but this one really takes the cake. After driving around, and around, and around in circles, TMZ is reporting that Britney stopped at a Van Nuys gas station to buy some gum. That seems like the way to get attention from the paparazzi. You know she was just asking for it!

To further the absurdity of her trip, Brit double back and headed into the gas station, snatched a lighter, and ran out triumphantly. It was like a 12 year old, snatching a candy bar and being proud they got away with it without the store clerk finding out. How juvenile of Britney, but boy was she proud of it.

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It can be hard to keep up with Brit Brit, but we’re going to try. There have been multiple stories on Britney in the past few days. Let’s try to catch up on the latest Brit Brit drama shall we?

Brit Still Driving with Kids According to TMZ:
According to TMZ, Britney is still allowed to drive with the children, despite K-Fed attorney, Mark Vincent Kaplan’s attempt at changing the terms of custody to deny Britney the right to drive with the children in the car. This comes after a video aired on TMZ, showing Britney with Jayden James and Sean Preston riding in the car as Britney ran a red light.

Let’s not forget how many photogs feet Britney has run over or her multiple driving accidents. Kaplan has reason to want Britney to not be able to drive with the youngsters. However, that denial by the court has yet to happen.

TMZ posted a picture of Britney who picked the boys up at the Four Seasons. Her court appointed monitor was riding in the front seat with the boys in the back. Let’s hope the court monitor recommends Britney lose her license period.

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Who the hell is the judge in the Lo Ho DUI case? Furthermore, why can’t we get Kiefer Sutherland’s judge for her instead? A month or two in jail would do the junkie actress some good.

Lo Ho was ordered 4 days in jail and 10 days of community service. Allegedly, her debt has been paid as she served one day (supposedly) previously and got time counted for two of the days. As of Gossip Giants’ last Lo Ho story, she had one day left and more community service, but as of today, Lo Ho is claiming she has completed all her time served.

Her “last” day of jail time served lasted just 84 minutes. That gave her just enough time to give the sheriff a BJ and get all her fingerprinting and stuff done, too. No, we’re kidding about the BJ part (we don’t have proof of that one, but wouldn’t put it past Lindsay), but not the ‘brief’ time she spent in jail. Also, it is said she finished her 10 days of community service, but did anyone see Lindsay do more than the one day she spent working at the Red Cross?

The jailbird, Lo Ho turned herself in at the Lynwood Jail at 10:30 AM and was released by 11:54 AM. It was, after all, overcrowded, which is why she got away with serving just 84 minutes of her one day sentence. I’m sure she really learned her lesson. After being fingerprinted, having her mug shot taken, and all that other “official” jail stuff she spent a minimal amount of time in a holding cell before the sheriff at the jail let her go.

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I swear all this bitch is known for is having kids and being ugly. Sure there is that Spice Girls thing, but its not like they can sing and she’s so thin that falling during a dance move will probably send her to the hospital. All that being said, OK Magazine thinks that Victoria Beckham is pregnant again. This, of course, leads us to ask…is David going blind because she is definitely getting uglier as time goes on. Stop breeding dude! If this keeps up the little swimmers are gonna be so afraid of the tunnel they will jump ship long before they make it down there.

Ok Magazine has a source that saw Posh at Petit Tresor, the posh baby store for celebrities and rich folk. They also claim that she has been speaking with interior designers about getting a nursery done in the couple’s new home. Rumor is that she’s keeping things on the DL because of the Spice Girls tour. Like anyone would miss a baby bump on a stick figure.

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Andrew Morton has written books about both Monica Lewinsky and Princess Diana, but this time he may be going too far. Morton has a biography coming out about Scientolofreak Tom Cruise and the Scientologists are fightin’ mad!

According to the Sunday Express and In Touch Magazine, Tom is furious, Katie is petrified, and the Scientologists are crazy enough to try and do anything to stop this book from happening next year as planned. The book, which looks to be an interesting read whether you like Cruise or not, is said to explore Tom and Katie’s relationship (or lack thereof), his sexuality, and his odd and controversial religious beliefs.

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I keep asking myself what the explanation for this is. Is she drunk, stupid, or just didn’t realize she has teeth to watch out for when she puts on her makeup? In truth, I don’t really care. The color almost makes her look good. Alright, it doesn’t make her look good at all, but it gives me a reason to look at her because I honestly don’t bother when she thinks she looks normal.

This little makeup mishap occurred at JJ Mahoney’s during Paris’ trip to Seoul. It’s really too bad. I mean look at how excited she is and the dumb bitch doesn’t even realize she’s sporting too much lipstick in the wrong spot. Of course, she could look at that bright side. If Revlon ever creates some Fire and Ice lipstick that is so fool proof any idiot can put it on correctly, she will surely get the endorsement deal. What’s even better? She saw plenty of people and none of them told her about her funked up teeth.

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The whiny, naggy, and ugly heiress of the Hilton clan was recently in a scuffle with Hallmark Cards. She decided to file a lawsuit claiming that Hallmark used her image to sell cards and that they need to pay her. The card depicts Paris with her head on a cartoon body, working as a waitress. Surprisingly enough, the card is the most flattering image of this overstuffed windbag that I’ve ever seen.

Hallmark has laughed off her suit stating the obvious when it comes to Hilton. They have responded by saying:

“Hilton has become a household name, based in large part on her efforts to draw attention to herself. Having done so, she has subjected herself to public scrutiny and the parodist’s pen. The First Amendment does not allow her to respond by welcoming the fawning and flattering, but silencing the critical and comical.”

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